Poll Results: Top 10 Gay Movies of 2010

Well the votes are in and I can now reveal the readers’ Top 10 Gay Movies of 2010. It turned out to be a one-horse race for the top with powerful gay documentary Out In The Silence clearly striking a chord last year with its focus on a bullied gay teen in a small town.

The link below is to thew “that Gay Movie” blog, and their results of a poll ranking top gay films of 2010. I’m thrilled to see Joe Wilson and Dean Hamer’s film top the list at #1. It is a film I’ve become very acquainted with, and have seen it many many times. The story of CJ and the bullying is very moving and powerful, as are the stories of all the people shown in the film. But for me, part of the real power of the film is the way it illustrates a different type of activism.

So, often with LGBT issues, the idea of activism is carrying signs and shouting for rights. And that may be a part of activism. But a different approach is also needed, and is displayed so powerfully here.

• Joe sends an announcement of their wedding to his hometown newspaper, unsure what will happen. The paper posts the announcement and photo. This act of being “out and visible” sets in motion a series of dialogues that happen in the letters to the editor as well as elsewhere. As most all of the responses are negative, many gays and lesbians would recoil and be silenced. But Joe and DEan? No way. They see this negativity, coupled with a humble letter from CJ’s mom, as a reason to explore the issue further.
• CJ’s mom bravely sends Joe and Dean a letter about her son. She is not “everyparent” for too often the parents of gay kids are not so supportive. But I have to wonder, if in most every teen’s life, isn’t there perhaps one adult- somewhere- a teacher, guidance councilor, neighbor, or family member- who is brave enough to reach out for some help, and give voice to a teen’s story?
• Joe and Dean are willing to be in dialogue, over the long haul, even with those who seem to be at total odds with them. This is perhaps, for me the greatest message of the film. As agents of change, do we each commit ourselves to be “in it” for the long haul, and be willing to keep an open dialogue, so that over time, there is an ability for changed minds and hearts?
• Joe and Dean “see” positive steps towards unity and progress everywhere. Some would just give up on Oil City and say it is too homophobic. But Joe and Dean, find, embrace and celebrate even little ways in which diversity, inclusion, and mutual respect  are shown.
• Maybe the most important: Joe and Dean continue to tour Pennsylvania and elsewhere, showing the film, and inviting viewers to be in dialogue. A discussion forum follows each screening, where everyone’s ideas and opinions are welcome if they remain respectful of everyone else.

Joe, says in the film, that it isn’t a film “about him” and I know what he means, but in other ways, it is very much about him, or more accurately, it is about what can happen when we each make ourselves visible in a meaningful way, and then stick around and participate in the dialogue that follows. Too often, LGBT activists want to be heard, and want to be embraced and accepted immediately. When this doesn’t happen, we discount, vilify or cut ourselves off from those we then, label as homophobic. They may very well be bigots and homophobes, or they may well be folks operating out of ignorance, who after some time and dialogue may see things differently. We never find out, because we don’t remain in dialogue, or the two sides (us vs them) just keep talking past each other.

This willingness to be in dialogue also doesn’t mean, simply being patient. As if we wait long enough, the hatred and discrimination will go away. Being in dialogue and being visible is a long term “active participation” thing. Coupled with other forms of activism, in the end will produced positive results.

via Poll Results: Top 10 Gay Movies of 2010 | That Gay Movie – All Gay Movies.