Last week, in a special election, Mark Sanford won an election to the US Senate over Elizabeth Colbert Busch to the surprise of just about everyone. Even many of the folks at Red State seemed to think he was going to lose. But nope. Mark Sanford is back in politics.

Prior to the win, Sanford is best known for claiming to be hiking the Appalachian Trail when he was really off in South America having an extramarital affair. Some on the Left portray his biggest failure as being the affair itself, since he is a Family Values Republican. But in reality, his biggest failing was the fact that while governor, he simply took off with no one knowing where he was going- a dereliction of responsibility. Like the linked post demonstrates, the desired attack is against the so-called Sanctity of Marriage family values arm of the GOP.

But many people, including many gays and lesbians could I’m sure, relate to the ex governor as he explained in a press conference, his affair. Yes, it was wrong, but he passionately loved this new woman, and he just couldn’t help it. A number of years ago, my partner and I read a book about gay couples who stay together, and I was surprised at just how many of them, were in other relationships at the time they met their true soul mates. Sanford was a real person, and while this was a blow to the Family Values’ argument about the sanctity of marriage, many could relate. And Sanford was far from the first GOP heavy hitter to shine a light on the fallacy of the sanctity argument.

Then, and now, the real issue isn’t/wasn’t the fact that here was a Republican who failed to be the family values’ guy. The real issue was that that even for the GOP, the family values, or sanctity of marriage argument used so often against gays and lesbians, is a red herring. Opposition to gay marriage has ever been about that really. It has always been, about bigotry and a desire to treat gays and lesbians as less than others. But claiming that you want to discriminate, doesn’t sound nearly as upstanding, so a false motive is used instead.

After Sanford’s win, I read more than a few comments on Facebook about how the GOP will really have to let go of the Sanctity of Marriage bull shit, because now, they have really shown their true colors! But those colors aren’t as people are making out. They have never cared about the Sanctity of Marriage. Unless progressives grasp this, and reframe the dialogue, it will appear as if they will keep scoring some wins.

If someone really believes in the Sanctity of Marriage:

• They are opposed to divorce.
• They don’t have multiple marriages, and most certainly they don’t have multiple divorces.

Gold stars for anyone who can name at least three other GOP favorites who claim to believe in the Sanctity of Marriage but who are guilty of these two points.  This is pretty easy folks!

Sanford’s win does no harm to the GOP, nor their (fake) argument about Sanctity of Marriage. It simply means that voters who do not identify as Democrats will vote for anyone, no matter what, as long as they aren’t a Democrat. These voters don’t care about an ideology or position on Family Values, but rather they are opposed to fairness, full equality, and most every progressive position.

I haven’t looked at any data to support this, but I have heard that people attribute his win to the fact that Elizabeth Colbert Busch was not really a Democrat, but Republican-Lite, and this won’t be the first election to demonstrate that Democrat and Progressive voters have no real use for a person who is too far to the Right to be seen as GOP-lite.

Gay voters might be encouraged to think that a legislator like Sanford would be useful as we move for Federal recognition of Same-sex marriage, but that would be a mistake. Sanford appears to step back and offer no support for Marriage Equality. He won’t claim a moral objection, rather he will use another conservative mainstay, anti-Washington Federalism! (Bolded Emphasis is mine)

What I have said is I think the current debate has little to do with same-sex marriage and a whole lot to do with democratic traditions in this country, and a whole lot to do with the courts. I think that if you’re a conservative, you believe in this notion of federalism, that one size does not fit all and that we shouldn’t have prescriptive answers coming out of Washington, D.C.

One has to wonder what “current debate” Sanford is talking about, for it surely isn’t the same debate that the rest of the Country is having!

There is another big GOP red herring argument used against Same-sex marriage: that kids must have a loving Father and a Mother. This argument too can be shown to be pure fallacy and sound-bite quality rhetoric, but I’ll leave that for another post. Sanford’s win shows us that the voting public hasn’t changed a whole lot in some places (and more places rather than fewer). If we are going to see a continued path towards fairness, Equality and respect for everyone, we must continue to put candidates forward who are not Republican-lite, and work our butts off pre-election to make sure we get progressives elected.