The linked post is from the blog, Open Left, and describes some really good news in the battle for Marriage Equality. While we in Pennsylvania are looking to see what our State Senate is going to do with SB 707, our neighbor to the south, West Virginia has again killed a bill that would have added discrimination into the state constitution. Time will tell if the PA Senate will be as enlightened as our neighbors.

So, who is really winning in the battle over marriage?

• This week, the West Virginia House of Delegates voted to kill a effort to put a statewide constitutional amendment on the ballot by a vote of 68-30.
• The Attorney General of Maryland has determined that Maryland will recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states.
• Washington DC permits same-sex marriages within the district, and recognizes marriages performed in other states.

Incidents such as these suggest that we are making real progress when it comes to Marriage Equality. Yet, groups like the National Organization for Marriage (NOM) which should be named, the National Organization against Gays and Lesbians, tell a different story. They point out that in every state where same-sex marriage has been put to a vote by the people, same-sex marriage has been defeated. They suggest this proves that the American people do not support or approve of same-sex marriage. So, which is it- the country is moving forward towards same-sex marriage, or it isn’t?

The Wrong Question

That may be a worthwhile question, but it may also be a hard one to answer. Marriage Equality advocates ignore it, or only point to the wins for our side, or  use any defeats to elevate themselves to victim status. But I think it is the wrong question to get concerned about. Marriage equality is essentially connected to a broader issue: the acceptance of gays and lesbians. When gays and lesbians are more fully accepted, and seen as “just like straight people,” then the right to civil marriage will be a no brainer for everyone. Gay marriage fails at the ballot box, because opponents are still able to paint gays and lesbians as monsters (at the worst of it) or at the very least, evoke high levels of fear among the majority of voters. The questions revolve around some sense of “is homosexuality acceptable,” and when a voter is either not sure, or is negative about homosexuality, we lose, and groups like NOM have accomplished their goal.

Framing the Question

So, on a different question, “who is winning the question of how the issue gets framed in the minds of voters.” it is clear the anti-equality folks are winning, and one reason for that is their focus on “the homosexual” as compared to our focus on being gays and lesbians who deserve equal rights. We are not only losing on this one, we aren’t really even on the board as a player! The GLBTQ community does little to counteract or confront this oppressive tactic of painting us as “homosexuals” and not referring to us as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. Yes, it is a clear and intentional strategy employed against equality. And it is working!

In a recent survey, when polled asking about homosexuals in the military, the majority of respondents were opposed, but when asked about allowing gays, and lesbians to serve the results were vastly different. This framing of the issue as being about “the homosexuals” as opposed to be about gays and lesbians, is an aspect of the struggle where not enough energy or focus has been placed, and it adds to the inability to move this movement further. As it stands, there are two sides who are speaking past each other. One reason for this is that most of us (gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders) don’t think of ourselves as homosexuals, and we treat that as old-fashioned language. But if we continue to fail to recognize how and why that language is so potent, we will continue to fail on this part of the struggle.

In One Word, What Are We?

There is another problem with this language thing. As a collective, we are a set of communities that we label with a various combinations of the pink alphabet soup. LGBT, GLBT, LGBTQ, are just a few examples, and sometimes the letters, “I” and “A” are also included- maybe a few others too. But marriage equality doesn’t touch all of these various parts of our diverse communities. So, are we working for LGBT civil rights when we seek marriage equality, or are we seeking rights for some while leaving transgenders and bisexuals with nothing? Another reason why the term “homosexual” has plays a role in the discourse, is that it allows the bigger issue of marriage as a civil right (and for whom) to go undiscussed. When we (in the LGBT community) operate from a victim stance (we have been wronged and treated as second class citizens), we need to speak with one voice and appear as one unified group. but we have no good way to identify as a single group past the pink alphabet soup. The term, “homosexual,” by default sets up the dichotomy of straight people, and everyone else, who the opposition mislabels as homosexual. While we know it is a mislabel, some don’t get too caught up in fighting it, because it implies a unified we, with that being those who are not straight.

While marriage equality is important and will help a huge number of people, it is also played a role in stripping apart the little cohesion that the LGBTQI-whatever-letters-you-want-or-don’t-want. We are so focused on marriage while transgenders still lack basic protections in housing and public accommodations, even in some states where gays and lesbians can marry.

This doesn’t make marriage equality or the people working for it bad or discriminatory. It does mean that broader dialogue about who we are as a collective of communities and how together we can work for civil rights for all the various parts of our diverse coalition is needed.

Some would say that if we gain marriage equality, but further marginalize trans women and men we haven’t accomplished much. Others will say that they are all steps forward to greater equality, and the struggle continues. Who is winning depends entirely on what question you are considering, and what terms you are using to define the various players in the struggle.

Equality Will Prevail

There are few better indicators that marriage equality can prevail, than the aggressive efforts of our opposition. They are working so hard to kill equality precisely because they know how close we are to achieving it, and as we make gains on any level, the battle will only intensify. but will it be a year? 10 Years? or 50 years till we see full equality? That answer may be more connected to which other questions we are asking? If our focus is on if we are winning for marriage, I believe we will slow the process. Or, if we lack a sense of urgency because equality seems inevitable, we will not see it in our lifetime. If on the other hand, we remember that marriage is one facet of the greater push for civil rights for all lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgenders, we can truly see progress for all. If we act with a sense of urgency, and persistence, being treated as first-class citizens will be just around the corner so to speak.

I’m interested in your thoughts, so leave a comment!

via Open Left:: Two good pieces of news on marriage equality.