Ken O’Neil’s blog “The Marrying Kind” is linked below, and it is a good read! Check it out. He tells the story of a marriage equality rally in New York. I’d quote a part of it here, except that it is such a great read, I don’t want to mess it up. So read it.

But there is a point for me. Maybe Ken would or wouldn’t agree, I don’t know. But this really isn’t about getting married, even if that is the tangible circumstances at the moment. The Equality movement is about fairness and about being treated like everyone else. OK, I’m going to pull a quote out of Ken’s blog:

Then a gay man and a lesbian came and talked to us. They told us they had just received a marriage license. Even though, they don’t love each other, or even know each other very well. They had previously tried to get licenses with the people they actually love. But since the great loves of their lives were of the same gender, they were denied.

Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and queer people deserve to be treated the same as everyone else in all civil matters. Period.

Ken claims he isn’t an activist, a claim that could be disputed. But taking him at his word, this too is an important point. We don’t need more activists- we need more women and men to be like Ken and get engaged, no matter if they see themselves as activists or not. We need women and men who are gay, straight, bi, trans to stop allowing themselves and others to be treated unfairly. You don’t want to become an activist? Then don’t. But be like Ken.

For Ken, it was about showing up. What will it be for you?

The Marrying Kind: I Am Not Now, Nor Have I Ever Been.


  1. Glad to point people towards your blog! Keep up the great work on the blog as well as the not-an-activist work!

  2. Thomas, thanks so much for reading & sharing my blog.