National Coming Out Day is months away, but it is possibly the single most important “queer holiday” that exists. If every gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans, and queer person came out, we would be light years further ahead in the struggle for full equality for all of us. Why? Because the more people know gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans, queer and supportive allies… in other words, the less secretive we all are… the less likelihood that the lies and misinformation used to demonize and other us will be successful. The lies are met with truth and reality, and those who identify as part of the LGBTQ community will be seen as part of the whole as opposed to being the enemies of the whole of society.

But why leave coming out to one day a year? Why not consider how to be coming out every day of the year? In that regard, who did you come out to today?

I know who my partner came out to this week, and without being too biased, he sets an awesome example. This week, Brad entered a contest on, and in the narrative to describe his item, he talks about “my partner” and uses male pronouns so that there is no doubt that he is gay and talking about a guy. So what’s the big deal you might say.

Well, I think this is a big deal! This is the type of situation where it would be easy to just keep sexual orientation out of it.  Why take the risk at offending readers to the site, right? But what happened is the opposite, and Brad’s item has had a very large number of views and received great comments. He comes across as authentic, real, proud of himself, and unashamed about his life- all of his life.

Coming out must be an individual and voluntary action.  We each get to choose to whom, and how we self-disclose. That’s part of where the power of coming out comes from- that it is an intentional action. Looked at from a different perspective, coming out is an act of occupying your own life, and in that regard, you empower yourself as well as others by your actions.

Take Brad’s lead! To whom can you come out to on this day, and every day?  How can you propel the push for LGBTQ Civil Rights forward through your authenticity?

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