Today is the Pittsburgh Dyke and Trans March, and every year as this event happens, it reminds me of the one post, I have written that in hindsight I really screwed up.  And periodically, I ponder what to do about that. On the one hand, it is in the past, and this is now. On the other hand, I grapple with it time and time again, so there is something unfinished for me.

A few years ago, I wrote critically about the Dyke and Trans March. That isn’t so odd.  I write posts that are critical. But that post was one post where I was fairly unsuccessful. Even if I felt I had important points to make, I made them in a poor way such that the points themselves never really got considered. As a blogger, I fail if a post itself stands in the way of people understanding the points I’m trying to make.

I weathered that experience, remained accountable to what I said, and took the criticism that came my way.  More importantly, I think I learned from that post and whole experience. I still offend some people and piss some people off, but I try to write such that the mere act of writing doesn’t stand in the way of what I am trying to say. I also learned that sometimes the best thing to do is not ask a question in my blog, but rather ask people in person and really listen to their answers. By doing that I gain experience and insight. No writer can expect everyone to love everything they write, but I can do a better job of picking my battles and do it in the context of the big scheme of things. Here is the bigger scheme of things as I see it:

The Dyke and Trans March is a critically important event for the participants and questioning any aspect of it comes across as questioning that importance.  The bottom line is that the March is extremely important. Period.

A number of people were central in helping me learn through that experience. Some were folks who I had offended and refused to really talk to me. Some were people who agreed with me on some level, but who understood how the way I had written, the timing of my post, and other circumstances sabotaged any potential good to come from the post. And others were people who I pissed off but were willing to talk to me through the process. I learned much about myself, and about being sensitive to the position of others.

If I hadn’t written it, would I be the same blogger today? Who knows. But I did it, it happened, and here we are now. But every year, I am reminded about how that post failed. How I failed as a blogger with that post. And I hope I’m doing things differently now.

A bit ago, I sent a tweet out wishing this year’s March much success.